Managing Out-of-Town Guests
If your guests will be traveling from out of town, it's considerate to reserve a block of rooms with a local hotel to get favorable rates.
Welcome your out-of-town guests with a small package left for them at the hotel. The package might include the itinerary with directions for all the weekend's events along with a small box of chocolates or other thoughtful gift.
Often, extra group events are arranged for out-of-town-guests such as a dinner on Friday evening, brunch on Saturday or Sunday morning, and a casual get together at the parents' home after the official celebration is over.
Special Transportation Arrangements
If the party is to be held at a different site than the synagogue, it is customary to arrange bus or private car transportation for both the elderly and the teenagers, to take them to party site and then back to the synagogue for pick-up after the party.
Party Favors
Party favors are usually only given to the kids, and reflect the theme of the event. A typical party favor is personalized with the name or initials of the bar or bat mitzvah child. It might be a tee shirt, shorts, beach towel, or sports cap. If your theme is a charity, let guests know that you are making a donation in place of party favors.
Candle Lighting Ceremony
A candle lighting ceremony has become popular. The bar or bat mitzvah lights a candle for the important people in his/her life, or for special family members who have recently passed away. Very often, as the candles are lighted, the bar/bat mitzvah recites the names in a clever, rhyming or poetic speech, which oftentimes ties into the theme. There may also be photos of those honored placed around the candles.
Photography
Will you hire both a still and video photographer? Make sure you check your synagogue's policy with regard to taking pictures during the service. Many synagogues only permit photography during the rehearsal.
Photographers can interview guests throughout the party to create a video montage of the event.
Centerpieces and Decorations
You'll need to plan centerpieces for the tables where your guests will be seated. You may also add centerpiece decorations to the food tables if it's buffet service. Centerpieces could be balloons, flowers, jars of colorful candy, topiaries, etc. If your theme is a charity, you could build a centerpiece around that. For example, if your charity is a literacy program for children, festively tied children's books could serve as your centerpiece for donation after the party. If your charity is a pet shelter, you might create centerpieces with colorful pet bowls and toys, and photos of animals waiting adoption.
You may also want to add other decorations to the party rooms. First, you'll need to choose a color to tie in with your theme, and this will be used in your table linens, and possibly chair swags. Beyond that your decorations can simply be fun elements, like a large balloon arch, or something that ties into your theme, like palm tree blowups or balloons for a tropical theme. Or simplify your decorations by decorating with photos or your child doing her favorite activities, service work, or other accomplishments.
Other Details
Parents will most likely give a speech about their child during the synagogue service. You may also want to prepare a speech for the beginning of the party.
Select someone to bless the wine and challah either in the synagogue or at the beginning of the party. This is an honor that could go to the parents, grandparents or other special guest.
Some parents provide socks for the girls so they can take a break from their high heels while dancing and playing games. Socks may be personalized with the name or initials of the guest of honor.
You'll want to prepare place cards to tell your guests where to sit. These can incorporate the theme of your party.
When guests arrive at the party, ask them to sign a large poster as a commemorative guest book for your child.
