Some say that dinosaurs have been extinct for thousands of years. Some hosts will argue against that fact and say that dinosaurs still walk the earth, only in disguise. They'll say that every bad party guest has let their inner dinosaur out to play.
To gain insight into the disruptive nature of dinosaurs, I consulted our Dinosaurs Guide Bob Strauss who has argued very convincingly why dinosaurs make bad pets. I believe that many of his arguments prove why they also make bad party guests. Therefore, here are most of Bob's reasons for why they make bad pets and the subsequent logic for why you should never let out your inner dinosaur when you've been invited to a party.
Dinosaurs are expensive to feed. You may show up at a party and think the buffet has been set out especially for you. It hasn't. Don't grab two plates and load up on as much food as you possibly can hold. Your hostess has spent much time determining just how much food will be needed for her party and has planned her budget accordingly. She can't be expected to take dinosaur feeding habits into consideration. So don't take so much of any one selection that nothing is left for other guests, unless there truly is only one piece left for you. Don't take two baseball size spoonfuls of the caviar no matter how excited you are to find it on the buffet. And don't pour yourself a pint of their best aged scotch at the bar.
Dinosaurs can't be taught tricks so it follows that dinosaur-like party guests haven't learned their table manners. They talk with their mouth full of food, reach across someone's plate to grab the salt shaker, or begin to eat before the host gives the okay or has completed the mealtime grace according to their family's custom.
Dinosaurs create a lot of poop. And while they're doing that they make a mess in your powder room. Yes, this isn't the most pleasant topic to discuss when we think about parties, but I'm sure most of us have wandered into a powder room at a party to find water splashed all over the countertops, the hand towel in a ball, the seat left up, the toilet paper roll empty or, worse, the toilet clogged and left for the next guest to deal with. Don't be a dinosaur, instead tidy up after yourself before leaving the room.
Just as dinosaur pets need to be be declawed, guests should consider removing their shoes when walking into someone's home. Take note of whether your host has a no-shoes policy and, if so, leave your shoes at the door.
Dinosaurs aren't very good with children and neither are some party guests. If you've been invited to a party where children are present, be aware of your own behavior around the kids. Adults should set a positive example and keep their drinking and table manners under control. And by all means watch your language around the kids unless you know the parents/hosts use their favorite four-letter words in front of the kids too.
Dinosaurs aren't very good with other dinosaurs, and likewise other party guests. If you've been invited to a party, it's your responsibility to play nicely with the other party guests. Join in conversations, and if a topic pushes your hot buttons, keep your responses lively but respectful of the other guests, and of your host's comfort, in particular.
Dinosaur pet-sitters are hard to find, as well as sitters for children of dinosaurs. But the party guest who brings along their uninvited children won't be appreciated by their host. If you have a problem finding a sitter for your children, always clear it first with your host before your bring them to the party with you. Your host will make it very clear whether you should "no problem, bring along the kids too" or "that's too bad, maybe next time you can join us." Listen for those not-too-subtle clues so you'll know what to do.
Dinosaurs take up a lot of room and so do some thoughtless party guests. Don't plunk yourself in the middle of the couch and spread your legs so that no one else will feel comfortable sitting next to you. Don't drop your bag, your jacket, your laptop or any other personal effects next to you to take up more room than your should. Instead, if you see there's a guest standing close by looking for a place to sit, graciously move over and make room for them to sit down next to you.
Dinosaurs mysteriously went extinct and nobody knows where they disappeared or why. A party guest that behaves like her inner dinosaur will leave after taking her fill of the food and beverages, without saying good bye to the host and thanking her for the lovely party. An even nicer gesture, which your neighborhood T-Rex would never consider, is to write a thank note after the party for the hospitality.
Unless you want the party invitations you receive to become as extinct as the real dinosaurs that once roamed the earth, don't let out your inner dinosaur. Keep him under wraps by reviewing these suggestions on how to be a good guest and you can look forward to future invitations.
