Have You Experienced One of These Parties?
Wednesday January 14, 2009
I heard about two different party ideas this week that were new to me. The first one was a chicken pox party where families get together at the home of an afflicted child, and socialize with the hope of spreading the virus to their children, and avoiding the vaccine. I know that there are strong feelings on both sides of the vaccination debate, and I won't get in the middle of that. But I do feel that a party is inappropriate, and unfair to the sick child suffering with the chicken pox.
The other party idea that was new to me was a baby shower raffle party. Guests are asked to participate in a raffle at a baby shower to raise money for the parents-to-be. I guess this has become a common trend, because I see that baby shower party supply sites actually sell raffle tickets for this purpose. If you're wondering, it's poor etiquette to do what amounts to asking for a money gift for the guest-of-honor. A baby shower for a first child is a welcoming celebration where the community helps stock the nursery for the new parents. A baby shower for subsequent children can also be a terrific celebration, and although the family may have the basic supplies, diapers or new small items that wouldn't make it past the first child (such as pacifiers) would be appropriate gifts to wish the family well. These second child showers are often called "sprinkle" showers. But raising money, except in cases where tragedy has struck the family, is inappropriate.
What do you think about these party trends? Have you ever been to one of these? Share your thoughts in our comments section below.
The other party idea that was new to me was a baby shower raffle party. Guests are asked to participate in a raffle at a baby shower to raise money for the parents-to-be. I guess this has become a common trend, because I see that baby shower party supply sites actually sell raffle tickets for this purpose. If you're wondering, it's poor etiquette to do what amounts to asking for a money gift for the guest-of-honor. A baby shower for a first child is a welcoming celebration where the community helps stock the nursery for the new parents. A baby shower for subsequent children can also be a terrific celebration, and although the family may have the basic supplies, diapers or new small items that wouldn't make it past the first child (such as pacifiers) would be appropriate gifts to wish the family well. These second child showers are often called "sprinkle" showers. But raising money, except in cases where tragedy has struck the family, is inappropriate.
What do you think about these party trends? Have you ever been to one of these? Share your thoughts in our comments section below.
Comments
We actually did a raffle for our baby shower, but not for ourselves! We gave the loot to the winner. They guessed the date, height and weight.
Now that I’m older, I do think it was a weird thing to have at my shower. I would never do that today.
The chicken pox party…so odd!
Hi Jen -
I think height and weight “pools” have been around as long as women have had babies. I think that makes it fun for the guests, and since the giving is in the other direction, I don’t really see a problem with it - so don’t feel too guilty. I’m sure it wasn’t your idea anyway.
I just think these new type of raffles are like holding a fundraiser for the expectant mom, and I see them as tacky.
Raffles at a shower where you’ve already shelled out money for a gift? Tacky, under any circumstances. Same for second showers - baby or wedding.
I don’t understand why it’s such a “burden” to the family and “friends” to celebrate a shower for another child just because he/she’s not the first. Each child is cause for celebration and anyone who’s complaining about it should stay home and make their own quiche. Every one I know would never take the raffle as an insult; they would support the parents any way they could. If it’s the child who would benefit, well, enough said.
I would hope these raffles are for the “needy”. I do not believe it should be a trend. Second child showers I think are for very close friends and family.
I don’t see a problem with a raffle at a baby shower, even when it’s for subsequent children. I hosted a baby shower for my cousin who was having twin girls and I did have the raffle. I didn’t expect each guest to purchase a ticket, but offered it. I think it went well and I’d do it again. No one found it tacky or offensive. Everyone knows how expensive babies can be and it’s no different from a dollar dance at a wedding. If guests get offended that easily and are not willing to give a few extra dollars to help out, then I feel sorry for them.